twenty-eight

this poem is dedicated to myself. to the failures i have let myself slip into recently. to the pain it has caused me.

tell me something i don't know

tell me something i don't know

that there has been a typhoon that made prices rise
that claimed a lot of lives.

the president gave a flashy speech
but the stupid public yells "IMPEACH"

rebels are captured and thrown in jail
all the public does is wail.

the church withdraws support
they tell everyone the government lacks rapport

tell me something i don't know

every night,

i keep reading...
but the pictures like TV images go running...
my grades slowly slipping...

songs leave me heartbroken
self-esteem sunken.

on a downward spiral.

i cry alone.

my solace...

i confide and cry with far away friends...

i am thrown into a vortex not knowing.
forever questioning.

the what ares and what ifs...

tell me something i don't know

i am broke.
i have failed miserably.
i am confused.
i am inadequately done.
i am in tears.

tell me something i don't know.

i am alive.
i am not alone.
i am surrounded by my friends.
i am capable of waking up tomorrow.

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no comment.

twenty-seven

this poem is called resurrection.

it is dedicated to the people i've loved and hated.

yesterday i died
i died because i was stabbed in the back, front and in the sides
i died because there was nothing and no one to live for.
i died because you took my pride, my love and my pedestal

away from me

yesterday i crawled
all bloody and fetid. the flies swarmed at my heart...
rotting and shredded.

i placed my heart on my palm...
ate it.

*crane was right.. the human heart is bitter.
it becomes bitter as soon as it ceases to love.

that night i cried.
because i envied you, you almost perfect puppet
because i loved you, you demented loveless pig
because i was subject to your torment, you ignorant witch
because i killed my own self... subjected myself to insult

my heart stopped. but i was still moving

but the blood in me didn't run out
my hair didn't fall out
and my tears stopped streaming down

and maybe it happened because fate still wanted me

and destiny... kept me alive all along.

today, i rode a phonenix
she was warm
and she embraced me

she told me:
"do not insult my admiration for you,
i have loved you for so long
but i had to wait before your past died with you.
you... have just been reborn"

i clutched her warm feathers and told her:
"i have waited for you so long..."

then, i felt my skin burn. my wounds healing.

she told me:
"my name is hope."

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wahooooo! a poem! a poem!

twenty-six... from kang with love

darling,

so many things can happen in 2 months...

my heart was broken. i was depressed. and now, i am thrown into a frenzy of not knowing. honestly- if i were to tell you what went in my mind over the time i left you. i left without saying bood-bye to you. i'm back. and ready to write again. today, i killed an asshole. the burglar who stole the irie vibes in me. i killed his pride. and i can say, that what he was to me before... has died.

it died with my past.

i went to school. failed tests, met new friends. and i guess it's high time letting go of the things that have burdened me for so long.

last sunday- i had a perm. yesterday, i had highlights.

this week. i'm going to do my best. i'll try to cut myself some slack and fix myself. emotionally and physically.

you know what... as much as i want to lie to myself telling my heart and mind that i know who i really am... i guess i don't.

i have to search for my soul again, don't i?

i think so too.

despite the fights, scandals, stupidities and failures i did long ago... maybe there's a damn good reason why i am still alive and i have all my limbs, teeth and hair intact. maybe i am off to a better life. with better people. i'm going to get better grades this time. not going to be depressed because of some prick.

you ask me, where and who?

i don't know, darling... but one thing's for sure.

i will never leave you again.

so stay with me...

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i didn't know why i wrote like that. i just wrote what i felt and what my mind dictated.

HELLO! and i hope you people enjoy the new layout!