thirty

for some time- i haven't been inspired, you see. i almost forgot what it felt like being the one people told their... dark secrets to... because at one point in my life- i promised myself to stop thinking about others' problems because i've my own. but god knows how hard it is, not caring. especially when you realize that you actually developed a bond with some people- and you get a share of their pain... whether you like it or not.

recently- i'm on an emotional standstill... confused. i ask myself who my real friends are. does my high school barkada still care about what i do? why did i refuse to attend my grade school reunion, but still signed up on the attendance sheet and left as soon as people came in? why am i finding myself feeling scathed by the fact that... i am lost.

i've never felt lost in a very long time.

and no one seems to understand.

and if this turns out like a whiny emo rock song. i'll feel even more sorry

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life is a grand garden
like those ones
in castles far, far away.

those gardens
that have those mazes
green, tall, manicured shrubs

and you get lost in it the minute you step foot in it.

you walk farther and farther away...
then all you can see
is greenery.

nothing else.

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hmm.... is green an overused word?